As a psychotherapist and Licensed Marriage Family Therapist, I work with couples who are looking for a safe person and a neutral place to work on their relationship concerns. Relationships can be both delightful and difficult, and yet we cannot live without them.
In my work with you in couples counseling, I invite you into a conversation about what is underneath the issues that have been difficult for you to resolve on your own. I help you recognize what makes things go wrong and learn how to step out of destructive patterns. As you begin to recognize and side-step patterns and start listening to each other, you can often return to feeling connected again. The result of mastering this process is an attunement with each other and often it is what couples have forgotten how to do. This is a primary goal of our work together.
"We need help communicating!"
It is worth noting that almost every couple I consult with in my counseling practice tells me that they have trouble communicating with each other and need help in this area. Over sixty years ago the great Carl Rogers (along with F.J. Roethlisberger) wrote in The Harvard Business Review that listening with understanding (vs. evaluative listening)
"...is the most effective agent we know for altering the basic personality structure of an individual and for improving his relationships and his communications with others."
Indeed empathic understanding is the gateway to real communication, and yet can be so difficult to do. The good news is that it is a skill that can be taught and learned, and with practice, it can greatly improve your relationships. When you begin to practice good speaking and listening skills, you will likely learn something about yourself and your partner that you never knew before. Most couples in couples counseling are interested in learning how to communicate better and I often teach communication skills in couples and marriage therapy.
Couples Therapy and Marriage Counseling can help address many issues including:
- Communication difficulties
- Premarital counseling
- Infidelity and affairs
- Adjustment to life changes (new job, retirement, empty nest, divorce, new baby etc.)
- Lack of intimacy and connection
- Sexual issues
- Jealousy and control issues
- Parenting and blended family concerns
- Traumatic event(s)
- Grief and loss
- Money issues
- Anger and resentment
- Lack of social support for the couple relationship
“Forgiveness requires a sense that bad behaviour is a sign of suffering rather than malice” – Alain de Botton